The four agreements show us that there is another way. By freeing ourselves from social structures and expectations, we can make new deals for ourselves. By making a pact with these four key agreements, an individual is able to significantly influence the amount of happiness they feel in their life, regardless of external circumstances. [6] According to Don Miguel Ruiz, everything we do is based on agreements we have made – agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, with life. But the most important agreements are those we make with ourselves. In these agreements, we tell ourselves who we are, how to behave, what is possible, what is impossible. A single agreement is not such a problem, but we have many agreements that come from fear, deplete our energy and reduce our self-esteem. One downside of the book is that some of the chords are too extreme and, if you take them literally, can cause additional problems in your life if taken without a proverbial grain of salt. However, with a little balance and a sense of openness, these chords can each be transformative and relieve stress. Here is an explanation of each of the four agreements. Although the chords are sometimes oversimplified, this is still a great little book with heavy ideas. Focusing on one of these agreements can significantly improve your life and reduce stress.
Focusing on all four can really change many people`s lives. If these suggestions are followed in a general and non-fanatical way, they can help you relieve a large amount of stress by helping you avoid thought and behavior patterns that create frustration, blame, hurt feelings, and other negative emotions. If you are impeccable with your speech, you will feel less negative energy in your daily life and you will have less conflict with the people around you. Most importantly, you talk to each other with compassion and optimism, which will help you plant seeds of self-love in your fertile mind. Ruiz explains that while this agreement is the most important, it is the most difficult to keep. [7] For this agreement, Ruiz first analyzes the word “impeccable.” The word impeccable comes from the Latin word peccatus and means “sin”,” and the “im” at the beginning of impeccable is the Latin prefix meaning “without”. Ruiz describes a sin as anything that goes against oneself, and therefore dealing impeccably with language means taking responsibility for one`s actions, and remaining without judgment against oneself and others. [8] Essentially, this agreement emphasizes the importance of speaking with integrity and carefully choosing words before they are spoken aloud. [9] “The Four Chords” not only gave me the four chords with which I made small positive changes in my life, but the book also helped me understand the process of “domestication” and how this “domestication” shaped my belief systems. While it`s important to let go of much of your concerns about the opinions of others, some comments need to be taken into account and the needs of others should also be respected. Don`t give up work to discern responsibility, otherwise you risk causing more stress in the long run. These four agreements constitute the practical path to individual freedom.
In part 1 of this 2-part video, we learn about the “domestication” of man and how all the rules and values of our family and society are imposed on us by a system of punishment and reward. As young children, our true nature is to love and be happy, to explore and enjoy life; We are absolutely authentic. But then we learn to be what others think we “should” be, and because it`s not acceptable for us to be who we are, we start pretending to be what we aren`t. When we are teenagers, we have learned to judge ourselves, to punish ourselves and to reward ourselves according to agreements we have never chosen. The Four Accords help us break self-limiting agreements and replace them with agreements that bring us freedom, happiness and love. To remove this fog from your mind, this mitote, so that you can start thinking clearly and create a new belief system within you, a system that gives you the freedom to measure yourself against who you want to be and not with someone else`s version of you, Ruiz offers four new agreements by which you can educate yourself and live: The Four Accords©, published in 1997 and sold about 9 million copies. It has been on the New York Times bestseller list for nearly a decade. Everything we do is based on agreements we have made – agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, with life.
But the most important agreements are those we make with ourselves. On average, 90% of what we read is forgotten in the first hours after reading. That`s why it`s so important to apply what you`ve read. What it entails: This concept deals with understanding how the behavior of others is just a reflection of them. When someone gives us feedback about our behavior or about us as human beings, it`s important to remember that no opinion is truly objective. We all have our prejudices, our filters through which we look at the world. For this reason, we should not consider someone else`s view of ourselves or our actions to be completely correct. When someone says something about us, they are really saying something about themselves and how they see the world. We learn to behave and what we should believe and accept as normal. Ruiz says that because we didn`t choose these rules and agreements, we should ask ourselves why we accept them and live according to them. The rules or “social agreements” transmitted by society domesticate us to live according to social norms without asking us why, believing only that parents, teachers and our friends have taught us what is right and wrong, right and wrong.
As children, we are rewarded for obedience and punished for disobedience, we learn not to go beyond the goal, eventually we surrender so as not to feel rejected, accused or condemned. Somewhere along the way, we no longer need to be controlled because we`ve learned the rules and we stick to them, and if we don`t, we`re doing a great job of punishing ourselves. It is possible to free ourselves from the structure to which we have become so accustomed by making 4 new agreements with ourselves. If you like the job or task you do, you will do your best without trying. Your work will feel effortless and you will perform much better. This final chord will help you increase the power of the other chords while freeing you from the old patterns. Why not try breaking one of the hundreds or thousands of chords you have right now? Maybe you`re thinking you can`t paint well – take out the watercolors and have fun creating something. By following the step-by-step process, you can gradually change things for the better. “We have millions of questions that need answers because there are so many things that the thinking mind can`t explain. It is not important whether the answer is correct; Only the answer itself makes us feel safe. That is why we assume it. When others tell us something, we make assumptions, and when they tell us nothing, we make assumptions to meet our need to know and replace the need to communicate.
We make all kinds of assumptions because we don`t have the courage to ask questions. The fourth agreement gives readers a better insight into how progress has been made in achieving their life goals. This agreement includes the integration of the first three agreements into everyday life and also the exploitation of their full potential. [8] It is a question of doing one`s best individually, which is different from the different situations and circumstances that the individual may encounter. .